Eavesdropping

Here are snippets of conversations I have heard over the past few days:

• "Did you see the whale on the beach?
  [Response]: Are you serious or are you talking about the neighbor?"

• "the wild boar was bothering our dog, Buster, so Terry went to the gun room to get a gun..."

• "you know we don't think it is a party unless we get to shoot something..."

• "The clothes at JCPenney look like they are made for street walkers not for 60 year old women.
  Response]: There are 60 year old whores too."

• "Welcome ladies, how are you today?"
  [Response]: My husband and I are fine.
  [Response]: Oh I am so sorry.
  [Response]: That is okay, it happens all the time.
  (At this point I had to turn around and see what this guy looked like and he was normal, average, etc.???)

• "and then she told me that he got in trouble before because he likes young girls"
  [Response]: So are you worried about Jessica?
  [Response]: No, she ain't that purty anyway.

I shit you not. You cannot make this stuff up.