- "Did you see the whale on the beach?
[Response]: Are you serious or are you talking about the neighbor?"
- "the wild boar was bothering our dog, Buster, so Terry went to the gun room to get a gun..."
- "you know we don't think it is a party unless we get to shoot something..."
- "The clothes at JCPenney look like they are made for street walkers not for 60 year old women.
Response]: There are 60 year old whores too."
- "Welcome ladies, how are you today?"
[Response]: My husband and I are fine.
[Response]: Oh I am so sorry.
[Response]: That is okay, it happens all the time.
(At this point I had to turn around and see what this guy looked like and he was normal, average, etc.???)
- "and then she told me that he got in trouble before because he likes young girls"
[Response]: So are you worried about Jessica?
[Response]: No, she ain't that purty anyway.
I shit you not. You cannot make this stuff up.