But why?

Long story, but I have to start at the beginning for it to all make sense.

In April 2005 my father passed away. I won't say unexpectedly as he had been suffering with COPD for years, but it was kind of because he died of a heart attack. A much more merciful way to go than smothering to death.

At the time my grandfather (his father) had just been put into the nursing home after recovering from his own heart attack.

Feeling melancholy and sad the first few days after Dad's funeral, I went to visit Grandpa.

He was a WWII veteran and though I knew he had served overseas he never wanted to talk about his experiences much. I also had bits and pieces of other memories in my head from my childhood regarding him -- something about serving time in jail for gambling and actually running for county judge once -- all things that sounded like a great story existed behind them.

So I took my hand recorder just in case I could get him to open up and talk.

It didn't take much coaxing once we got out to the patio where he could "chew" and the stories flowed. I still have that recording and hope to make sense of all that at some point in a book or something of the like.

That isn't what this is about though.

My aunt and uncle who have lived in southern Alabama for 35+ years had been in town due to Grandpa's health and then inadvertently Dad's funeral. They showed up at the nursing home and we were all visiting.

The maintenance man at the nursing home had been mowing when he stopped to help a few residents light up (joys of old age).

They began talking and discovered he was from the same town as they lived in and knew all the same people. After much catching up, he asked my aunt/uncle if they would do him a favor. You see his 6 year old son was killed in a road accident when he lived down there several years prior and there was no one left to check on the grave site. They exchanged phone #'s and that was it.

In December 2006, I was reading the local newspaper when I noticed a 14 year old had been killed while walking on the side of the road after fishing. It was this man's other son.

The sadness of losing 2 of your 3 boys in a similar manner many years apart disturbed me. I could not imagine the questions that must run through his head. The least of it being "why?"

I forwarded the obituary on to my aunt and she was equally shaken.

Yesterday I was reading the local paper online and was chilled to my bones when I read that his third son - 17 years old - was killed in a car accident this weekend.

I can't even get my mind around how messed up he has to be.

He doesn't know me. He probably wouldn't remember me, maybe Grandpa, but not me.

Yet I can't stop thinking about him and his grief.